Who is worried about offending others?

artyboo
artyboo Forum Participant Posts: 457
edited April 2016 in How to use Club Together #1

I do find, that when I am reading discussions that I am afraid to comment in the negative so I just don't bother. I can't work out whether I am doing it because I don't want to offend, or whether I just don't want criticism of my opinion and be cast into
the dark unknown with everyone rounding an attack on me. Anyone else feel this?

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  • JVB66
    JVB66 Forum Participant Posts: 22,892
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    edited April 2016 #2

    All the timeWink

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #3

    No, I don't feel that, Arty. Anyone who attacks/bullies another poster is in breach of the T&Cs. It's happened to me and I reported the perpetrators but it hasn't stopped me posting my views. 

  • fur ball
    fur ball Forum Participant Posts: 155
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    edited April 2016 #4

    Yes, I have realised there's some sensitive souls on here who take things rather serious and personal if you don't conform to the accepted believes. I apologise to anyone who now feels offended.

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #5

    members should be able to give their view of a thread with out the fear of being rebuked , I know that I am not going to agree with everything that people post on CT , and if  I post a question about something I will accept positive and negative posts without
    attacking a poster because I didn't like the answer 

    at the end of the day ,I can't see how someone can be bullied on a page of words when we dont know the person at the other end of the post , I have never meet any other poster ,so I don't know who you all are , but on balance you would all get an invite
    under my wind out canopy for a cup of tea and a biscuit Happy

    i really am a nice poster , especially if you tickle my tummyLaughing

  • JVB66
    JVB66 Forum Participant Posts: 22,892
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    edited April 2016 #6

    How does it go "sticks and stones" etcSticking Tongue Out

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #7

    Yes, I have realised there's some sensitive souls on here who take things rather serious and personal if you don't conform to the accepted believes. I apologise to anyone who now feels offended.

    What a strange post, FB. However, it doesn't offend me. Why would it?

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #8

    members should be able to give their view of a thread with out the fear of being rebuked , I know that I am not going to agree with everything that people post on CT , and if  I post a question about something I will accept positive and negative posts without
    attacking a poster because I didn't like the answer 

    at the end of the day ,I can't see how someone can be bullied on a page of words when we dont know the person at the other end of the post , I have never meet any other poster ,so I don't know who you all are , but on balance you would all
    get an invite under my wind out canopy for a cup of tea and a biscuit Happy

    i really am a nice poster , especially if you tickle my tummyLaughing

    For 'bullied' read ganged up on, hounded around the board, picked on. You've seen it. 

  • fur ball
    fur ball Forum Participant Posts: 155
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    edited April 2016 #9

    It was never meant to offend tinwheeler, just saying that in all walks of life some people get easily offended, the trouble with forums and the like is people haven't realised that if something offends you keep scrolling down and it goes away and you don't
    have to give it another moments  thought.:-)

  • davetommo
    davetommo Club Member Posts: 1,431
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    edited April 2016 #10

    what we all need to realise is that we all have different views

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #11

    members should be able to give their view of a thread with out the fear of being rebuked , I know that I am not going to agree with everything that people post on CT , and if  I post a question about something I will accept positive and negative posts without attacking a poster because I didn't like the answer 

    at the end of the day ,I can't see how someone can be bullied on a page of words when we dont know the person at the other end of the post , I have never meet any other poster ,so I don't know who you all are , but on balance you would all get an invite under my wind out canopy for a cup of tea and a biscuit Happy

    i really am a nice poster , especially if you tickle my tummyLaughing

    For 'bullied' read ganged up on, hounded around the board, picked on. You've seen it. 

    TW, I think this is something that we both see differently and that's fine , and I would not force my view on anyone , but hopefully they would accept my opinion ,as I would theirs , yes some posters do get followed round the forum , but most of us give as good as we take ,so no real harm done 

    in my shop I have lots of disscusions with my customers and often we have opposing views ,but that doesn't mean that we don't like each other and makes for good debate and good customers 

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #12

    It was never meant to offend tinwheeler, just saying that in all walks of life some people get easily offended, the trouble with forums and the like is people haven't realised that if something offends you keep scrolling down and it goes away and you don't
    have to give it another moments  thought.:-)

    Quite so, FB, but I can absolutely understand the OP feeling intimidated when she reads a post such as your earlier one which didn't actually express the views you are now stating. Still, I'm glad you've cleared that one up. 

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #13

    members should be able to give their view of a thread with out the fear of being rebuked , I know that I am not going to agree with everything that people post on CT , and if  I post a question about something I will accept positive and negative posts without
    attacking a poster because I didn't like the answer 

    at the end of the day ,I can't see how someone can be bullied on a page of words when we dont know the person at the other end of the post , I have never meet any other poster ,so I don't know who you all are , but on balance you would all
    get an invite under my wind out canopy for a cup of tea and a biscuit Happy

    i really am a nice poster , especially if you tickle my tummyLaughing

    For 'bullied' read ganged up on, hounded around the board, picked on. You've seen it. 

    TW, I think this is something that we both see differently and that's fine , and I would not force my view on anyone , but hopefully they would accept my opinion ,as I would theirs , yes some posters do get followed round the forum , but most of us give
    as good as we take ,so no real harm done 

    in my shop I have lots of disscusions with my customers and often we have opposing views ,but that doesn't mean that we don't like each other and makes for good debate and good customers 

    I was giving you my definition of bullying within the realms of forum use, Husky.

  • tombar
    tombar Forum Participant Posts: 408
    edited April 2016 #14

    I'll give my view whatever.  Do not think of upsetting other people.  They have their views and I have mine.  I respect anyone who sticks to their views where I agree or not - its how you converse with each other.  If everybody agreed on the same things
    - end of conversationHappy

  • Oneputt
    Oneputt Club Member Posts: 9,156
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    edited April 2016 #15

    I occasionally spit out the proverbial but generally I treat people the way I like to be treated, this doesn't mean we have to agree with everyone and everything but a little respect goes a long way.  

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #16

    I occasionally spit out the proverbial but generally I treat people the way I like to be treated, this doesn't mean we have to agree with everyone and everything but a little respect goes a long way.  

    Nail on head, One. We can disagree but still remain polite without belittling or berating the other person.

  • Greythatch
    Greythatch Forum Participant Posts: 24
    edited April 2016 #17

    Some people are thin skinned and others are not. Doesn't make either party in the right

    The latest story on the Daily Mail website tells the story that the university has decreed that showing any kind of disgreement ( even by putting up your hand) is too much.

    Surely most will think this is OTT  

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3520620/University-student-threatened-removed-meeting-violated-safe-space-rules-putting-hand-up.html

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #18

    Well, hello. I've seen you liking your favourite posts.

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #19

    for me "bullying" is someone who has me by the throat ,threatning to stuff a bonio up my a@r........Surprised

    where as on CT ,if someone try's  to pressure me in to their ways of thinking ,I just see them as opinionated Undecided

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #20

    Well, hello. I've seen you liking your favourite posts.

    Does anyone like a post they don't like then!!!InnocentSealed

  • Rocky 2 buckets
    Rocky 2 buckets Forum Participant Posts: 7,101
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    edited April 2016 #21

    HD, that's assault not bullying. If the Bonio gets inserted then that's GBH. If they're willing to take it out again. . . .Thats respectHappy

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #22

    Well, hello. I've seen you liking your favourite posts.

    Does anyone like a post they don't like then!!!InnocentSealed

    You could ask him.

  • Cornersteady
    Cornersteady Club Member Posts: 14,632
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    edited April 2016 #23

    we do indeed have different viewpoints, and I never expect anyone to agree with anythng I post (but it is nice when that happens). However I do expect that any subsequent posts will be civil and my views not ridiculed. Present all your counter views you want but do it rationally and pollitely. If it's a good post I may change my viewpoint, and when that happens I say so.

  • IanH
    IanH Club Member Posts: 4,708
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    edited April 2016 #24

    I've possibly made the odd comment that some people have disagreed with......but obviously they are wrong.

    Sometimes several people have disagreed with me and some might see that as 'ganging up' on me or maybe even bullying......of course, the reality is that it's just several people tbat are wrong Laughing

    I try not to let it get to me and continue to teach them the error of their ways.

    Sunday departures, anyone? Laughing

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #25

    corners , have you ever changed your view on a subject because of a well presented post ??

    i had my views on solar panels changed because of the posts on here !

  • Rocky 2 buckets
    Rocky 2 buckets Forum Participant Posts: 7,101
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    edited April 2016 #26

    I've possibly made the odd comment that some people have disagreed with......but obviously they are wrong.

    Sometimes several people have disagreed with me and some might see that as 'ganging up' on me or maybe even bullying......of course, the reality is that it's just several people tbat are wrong Laughing

    I try not to let it get to me and continue to teach them the error of their ways.

    Sunday departures, anyone? Laughing

    Excellent Ian, the best case of skewed logic I've ever readCool

  • Cornersteady
    Cornersteady Club Member Posts: 14,632
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    edited April 2016 #27

    What did Brian Clough say:

    On disagreements with players: “We talk about it for 20 minutes and then we decide I was right.

  • Cornersteady
    Cornersteady Club Member Posts: 14,632
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    edited April 2016 #28

    corners , have you ever changed your view on a subject because of a well presented post ??

    i had my views on solar panels changed because of the posts on here !

    Yes, when someone brings up something I hadn't thought about, or a new way of doing things. Like Ian's brialliant way of winding the EHU cable

  • Cornersteady
    Cornersteady Club Member Posts: 14,632
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    edited April 2016 #29

    I wouldn't say I am the best poster on CT. But I am in the top one

  • huskydog
    huskydog Club Member Posts: 5,464
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    edited April 2016 #30

    Well, hello. I've seen you liking your favourite posts.

    Does anyone like a post they don't like then!!!InnocentSealed

    You could ask him.

    OK, greythatch, do you like a post you don't like ??Happy

  • Tinwheeler
    Tinwheeler Forum Participant Trusted Posts: 23,374
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    edited April 2016 #31

    So, please tell us, Arty (Boo, not the other one), has anything you've read here removed your nervousness about posting? As you can see, the vast majority of people believe it's OK to disagree as long as it's done with respect. Most people here are decent
    and polite.

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