The cold chill of reality?
CALLER: Is this Rocco's Pizza?
GOOGLE: No sir, it's Google Pizza.
CALLER: I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.
GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Rocco’s Pizza last month.
CALLER: OK. I would like to order a pizza.
GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir?
CALLER: My usual? You know me?
GOOGLE: According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.
CALLER: OK! That’s what I want…
GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?
CALLER: What? I detest vegetables.
GOOGLE: Your cholesterol is not good, sir.
CALLER: How the hell do you know?
GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
CALLER: Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.
GOOGLE: Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly.
According to our database, you only purchased a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.
CALLER: I bought more from another drugstore.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.
CALLER: I paid in cash.
GOOGLE: But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.
CALLER: I have other sources of cash.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law.
CALLER: WHAT THE HELL?
GOOGLE: I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.
CALLER: Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I'm going to an island without internet, cable TV, where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.
GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago…
It certainly worries me as to how many folk know info about me that I would not knowingly wish them to know.
How do you feel about the way we are no longer private people?
Comments
-
Funny but a disconcerting element of truth in there.
0 -
Wasn't there a similar thread with regard to facebook
0 -
It suits me fine RF. I’m happy to get spam(it’s easy to stop), I’m happy to be reminded & have a tailored experience based on my profile needs from the likes of Google et al. I am canny enough to protect all of my sensitive data to the best of my ability-I’ve not been scammed nor had my data abused yet👍🏻. The ‘Google’ world of tomorrow is an experience that can only get better(in my opinion)👍🏻😊. Because I happily sign up for the whole ‘tailored experience’ gig, a few days ago I got an email telling me my current energy contract is soon to expire & there is one company that is £120 cheaper over the contract term with a possible Amazon voucher option. To me that level of service is priceless.
0
