For parents reading school reports
Saw this on the BBC, and it is so so true, I've certainly used a few of these
It's that time of year again. Teachers up and down the land have been slaving over their end-of-year reports and parents are eagerly awaiting to hear whether or not their little angels are top of the class.
But what does "full of self-confidence" or "lively and enthusiastic" really mean?
We asked one teacher - who goes under the name of Mrs Smith - to let us know what those positive-spin comments actually mean.
Here are her thoughts:
Is a sociable member of the class: Doesn't really come to school to work, much prefers having a gossip in the toilets
Knows their own mind: Not particularly good at doing what they are asked to do
Always enthusiastic when working in a group: Likes to be in charge, a proper bossy boots
Full of self-confidence: A little too arrogant and won't take being told they are wrong
Needs to channel their enthusiasm into their own work: Please get on with your own work and leave the rest of the class to get on with their own
Is always curious: Shows too much interest in anything and everything except their work
Enthusiastic contributor to class discussions: Always has an opinion on everything and shares it loudly at every opportunity
Displays excellent listening skills: Never has an opinion on anything, would rather self-combust than put their hand up
Open to new ideas: Easily led into poor behaviour
Wonderful unique character: Thank goodness there is only one like you in my class
Has shown an interest in self-guided learning: Decides on a daily basis which work to complete
Has an interesting and inquiring mind: Does your child ever stop asking questions?
Occasionally lacks focus: Sits as far from the window as possible to prevent daydreaming
Has a strong sense of right and wrong: Bit of a telltale if we are honest
Lively and enthusiastic: Goodness me your child is hard work
Has a wide circle of friends: I have run out of seats to put your child in where they won't chat
Knows the school rules well: Is reminded by me of them daily
Makes everyone smile: Bit of a clown
A bubbly, fun-loving personality: Honestly child, calm it down a little
Is ready for a new challenge: I'm counting down the days until the end of term
Enjoys working independently: Finds sharing hard
Is a pleasure to teach: Honestly, your child has helped preserve my sanity this year
Comments
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well even to me, the contradictory gender as Basil would say are definitely more fun than maths! 0 -
I fundamentally disagree with both of you. . . .For the very reasons you have👏🏻👏🏻😊
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Ha ha ha........
I found this funny as well Corners, as an ex PE student, (changed tack after leaving college) the art of writing a diplomatic report is an art. Strikes me you could apply something similar at times for on here as well.........
My favourite? "Open to new ideas: Easily led into poor behaviour!"
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One I often used was
A somewhat uncooperative attitude may have hindered Chantelle's progress over the year
There always seemed to be a direct correlation between names like Chantelle, Bailey, Precious (really), Charlene (very popular after Neighbours ) Clinton, or anything nicknamed like Shaz or Bazzer, and an uncooperative attitude.
My favourite all time name was pronounced Fe-Mar-lay. Before I saw how it was written I asked where she got the name, thinking it was French perhaps, and she said her mother had read it on her wrist band written by the nurses when she was born - female
That is a true story!
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Another true story related to names was told to me by a teacher friend.
A new boy joined her class and his mother introduced him as Huggy. When asked how Huggy's name was spelt, his mother replied H-U-G-H-I-E.
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I was banned from the reception of the pool I had my office in during swimming lessons, I couldn't keep a straight face at some of the names! I did compliment one parent on her choice of Isabella, thinking she knew about Spanish royalty. Transpired not so, the little darling had been conceived during a visit (
) to a notorious local night club! 1 -
I worked in the driving licence section of the county council, that dates me 😉, in the holidays, noting endorsements on the record cards. One very memorable name was Didwithskill J****. It took my awhile to work it out and i thought it was very bad handwriting from the court but a trawl through the record cards conformed the spelling. I was sweet and innocent 15 years old then.
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